Just a heads up for all those who might get infuriated reading this or think of
it as contradictive, I’m not here to please you all, so buzz off!
It’s funny how we start missing our own self when we’re on the path of introspection. We blame everyone else who were close to us for changing and not missing us but have we ever realized how circumstances are changing our true identity? And then, one fine day reality strikes and we’re introduced to a brand new self who we don’t recognize! Well atleast that’s true in my case. The dancing, carefree, fun loving, cheerful, bindaas me is lost somewhere. I remember, nothing could bother her or stop her from doing what she wanted but I guess permanence cannot be achieved. This change that we go through isn’t usually due to free will, but is rather due to the surroundings and the little drops of ‘wisdom’ that we imbibe on our journey of life which drag us on the so called path of maturity and sensibility.
Whatever happened to the innocence, the bright smiles which sparkled in our eyes, the excitement on seeing our favourite icecream flavor, the spontaneity, the dancing like no one is watching, the singing like we’d beat AR Rahman, the sad faces when our toys broke, the hugs like we’d never part, and the tears on the sight of blood? Have we grown so much that all that is left in our lives is shrewdness, fake smiles, fat free icecream, appointments, clapping in the name of dancing, shying away from humming our favourite song, computer games, facebook byes and hidden tears?
This isn’t someone else’s story which we are witnessing from the side rails, but it is our very own story which we have conveniently decided to ignore and live with, in denial. No one cares because they’re not responsible. We are the ones who have let ourselves change to adapt to this cold world, do we have an option?
I miss myself and I really wish to bring back the true smile on my face again coz I’m done with the fake ones. I want to dance in the rain, scream while singing "rolling in the deep," drink till I'm out, sleep for the entire day, get a blue and purple streak in my hair, put on black nail-paint, lie on the beaches, get more tattoos, capture abstract moments in my camera and fly away in the blue skies! I will not give a damn anymore! I’m going to make the most of it even if I’m alone in it. Yes, I miss my school friends and all the fun we had but I can’t reverse time and I’m not going to waste more mourning over photographs I couldn't be a part of. Neither am I going to hang onto my past nor complain about circumstances that I’m in.
I guess this is my New Year moment!
Happy 2012!!
"Jo hua hai wo hota hai,
Jo hona hai woh hona hai,
Jo tere bas mein baatein hain,
Unhe khamakha kyun khona hai?
Kar chalna shuru tu,
Mudke na dekh tu,
Jaise hai sahi hain,
Ek main aur ek tu!"
It’s funny how we start missing our own self when we’re on the path of introspection. We blame everyone else who were close to us for changing and not missing us but have we ever realized how circumstances are changing our true identity? And then, one fine day reality strikes and we’re introduced to a brand new self who we don’t recognize! Well atleast that’s true in my case. The dancing, carefree, fun loving, cheerful, bindaas me is lost somewhere. I remember, nothing could bother her or stop her from doing what she wanted but I guess permanence cannot be achieved. This change that we go through isn’t usually due to free will, but is rather due to the surroundings and the little drops of ‘wisdom’ that we imbibe on our journey of life which drag us on the so called path of maturity and sensibility.
Whatever happened to the innocence, the bright smiles which sparkled in our eyes, the excitement on seeing our favourite icecream flavor, the spontaneity, the dancing like no one is watching, the singing like we’d beat AR Rahman, the sad faces when our toys broke, the hugs like we’d never part, and the tears on the sight of blood? Have we grown so much that all that is left in our lives is shrewdness, fake smiles, fat free icecream, appointments, clapping in the name of dancing, shying away from humming our favourite song, computer games, facebook byes and hidden tears?
This isn’t someone else’s story which we are witnessing from the side rails, but it is our very own story which we have conveniently decided to ignore and live with, in denial. No one cares because they’re not responsible. We are the ones who have let ourselves change to adapt to this cold world, do we have an option?
I miss myself and I really wish to bring back the true smile on my face again coz I’m done with the fake ones. I want to dance in the rain, scream while singing "rolling in the deep," drink till I'm out, sleep for the entire day, get a blue and purple streak in my hair, put on black nail-paint, lie on the beaches, get more tattoos, capture abstract moments in my camera and fly away in the blue skies! I will not give a damn anymore! I’m going to make the most of it even if I’m alone in it. Yes, I miss my school friends and all the fun we had but I can’t reverse time and I’m not going to waste more mourning over photographs I couldn't be a part of. Neither am I going to hang onto my past nor complain about circumstances that I’m in.
I guess this is my New Year moment!
Happy 2012!!
"Jo hua hai wo hota hai,
Jo hona hai woh hona hai,
Jo tere bas mein baatein hain,
Unhe khamakha kyun khona hai?
Kar chalna shuru tu,
Mudke na dekh tu,
Jaise hai sahi hain,
Ek main aur ek tu!"
Kya Baat, Kya Baat, Kya Baat(this is what Mithun does in a talent show, when he is extremely happy with the performance of a participant).
ReplyDeleteMan you have actually churned out the Brutal Truth of life.....that the more we grow, the more we miss the real us......Kudos to ur expressions
Yes, the bitter truth!
ReplyDeleteI wonder why people start living life as a punishment when there's so much more to it..
It can be really beautiful if we want it to be.
my ltl girl...kab se itni mature ho gayi? hairat hai....~
ReplyDelete